Clear As Mud

The world of SSDI and Long Term Disability is murky. The only way I've been able to figure it out is to live it. I spent much of the past twenty years in project management and it's very frustrating how complicated this system is. It resists understanding because the insurance companies involved don't want anyone to understand the system. Neither do the lawyers. Their incentives are to hide information.

The situation I'm in now has so far resisted understanding without doing. I am currently on SSDI from the government. That's great news. I'm also on LTD from my employer's disability insurance company. The two provide me with 60% of my former salary. I worked for my employer for 14 years and left them on good terms.

Since I went out on disability three years ago, my LTD insurance company has been pushing me to get an evaluation for vocational rehab. They've made it clear they'd be happy if I did any job. I worked as an IT manager. They'd be fine if I worked at Wal-Mart or Taco Bell. If I understand them correctly, they're trying to make me feel so insulted that I'd walk before I took a job like that.  Meanwhile, I am a stay at home Dad and don't want to leave my kids for minimum wage.

So we're in a position of trying to out maneuver each other. They've forced my hand and now I'm going to my state's vocational rehab center for the blind and visually impaired. Fine. Here are the question I can't figure out:

1) Can my LTD company make me take a job above the SSDI threshold? Can they make me lose my SSDI?

2)If I get a job that pays below the SSDI cutoff, do they then cut my LTD benefits by the amount I'll make?

3)What level of income (below SSDI threshold) is acceptable? Do I have to max out my earnings? 

So far this is clear as mud. And stressful as hell. 

Handicap Bathroom Hell

I'm visually impaired and use a white cane. Disabled bathrooms have been built at great cost and I'm often directed to use them over traditional bathrooms. Probably to help justify their expense. Most handicapped bathrooms are setup for people in wheelchairs, which is fine. It's just that the visually impaired often don't do well in rooms designed for wheelchairs.

Once, during jury duty, I was led to the handicapped bathroom. I walked in and the lights were off. It took me a while to figure out where the switch was located because it had been lowered to the level of a wheelchair. I kept turning around in the dark until I found it. When I got up from the toilet, I stood up straight, like a person who can walk. I gouged my back on a jacket hook that had been placed at low level behind the the toilet.

After finishing, I took a step and bruised my thigh on the corner of a sink, which was much lower than expected. After recovering, I tried to clean my glasses in the automatic faucet but it wouldn't stay on long enough to get my glasses wet. Then I couldn't find the towel dispenser. I left the bathroom disgruntled and in pain. The officer who had accompanied me asked how I liked their new handicapped bathroom. I told him it was "fine."

On another occasion I was in Paris waiting in line for a bathroom and an attendant grabbed me and led me to the front of the line to the handicapped bathroom. I could tell everyone hated me for cutting them. I had been happy waiting in line like everyone else. I did my business and went to flush the toilet. In France, the toilets don't have a consistent flush mechanism position. It can be on top of the toilet, on the side, on the wall. Any wall. I spent more time trying to figure out where the button was than I had taken using the bathroom. The attendant came back to check on me. I was holding up the line. But there was no way I was going to leave the bathroom unflushed. I eventually found the button on the wall beside the toilet.

There's some dark humor about these scenes that even I can appreciate. It's just further proof that a one size does not fit all approach when it comes to disabled bathrooms. 

Canes and Crazies

 Back in June, I traveled to Chicago and went to Millennium Park. At one point my friend left me on a sidewalk to seek out a restroom. So I stood there with my cane. Literally hundreds of people passed by. Several of them made comments about me. Hey guys, I'm visually impaired, not deaf. Many even pointed at me like I was a zoo animal. Not really a big deal or anything I'm not used to.

Eventually a group of people came up to me. They were dressed alike in matching t-shirts. I could see that much but not the logo. Their leader, a young guy, asked me a very strange question. "What is going on here?" His tome was accusatory.

His question totally caught me off guard. I've had people get into my face before for "faking being blind," and that's what I thought he was saying. My reply back to him was pretty harsh. "None of your business!"

The guy put his hands up and said something like, "No offense. We're just out there looking for people to pray with. Can we pray with you about your eyes?" I don't care what your religion is, that's just rude. I told them to take a hike.

Special Transportation

So my case worker at services for the blind told me I should apply for special transportation services from the city. This would allow me to schedule a van to pick me up and take me places. I'd still have to pay for the rides but it would be well below normal taxi rates.

So I made an appointment. My case worker picked me to take me downtown. She told me that I probably wouldn't get access to special transportation because none of her visually impaired clients ever had (just the totally blind ones).

Half an hour later, I left my meeting with the city approved for special transportation. My case worker asked me how I convinced them. It was easy, I made a Power Point deck. I took pictures of the intersections I had to cross on a normal basis. I took photos of where I'd been hit by cars (3 times in 10 years).  I left my deck with my case worker to use as a template. 

So the visually impaired can get services, you just have to tell your story.