Losing Well Part 18

Continuation of my series, Losing Well. Part 1 can be found here.


December 2012
2012 was a year of transition. Feeling that my vision was running out, I convinced my brother to take me to Europe for the first time. It was amazing. I did all the typical tourist things. We went to the Eye, the Tower of London, the Tower Bridge. We eventually got out of the city and went to Stonehenge, Oxford and Dover. Then we took the train to Paris and I got to go to the top of the Eiffel Tower.

After I got home, my eyes continued to get blurry. My job was very visual. I did budgets in Excel, I put together Power Point presentations for upper management. I read technical documents to estimate project costs. And then I’d be instant messaging three or four people at all times. Plus email. While on a conference call. All of this happened at the same time. I was a multitasking machine. But I couldn’t keep up. 

I realized I needed help when I went to a Fourth of July celebration and couldn’t focus on the fireworks. It was like I had cataracts all over. The world was a blurry fog.

In July, I went to see my retina specialist about the blurry vision. I assumed he’d tell me that I needed another YAG surgery. What he told me shocked me. He told me there was nothing to be done. I’d reached end stage of RP. He told me to get my affairs in order while I could.

With my doctor’s blessing I went for a second opinion. My surgeon agreed with my retina specialist; there was nothing to be done.


9 July 2012
I hate visual field tests. Reminds me of all that I’ve lost.


18 August 2012
Just a sprain


19 August 2012
I'm bed ridden and the cable is out. Curse you Time Warner!


20 August 2012
Big thank you to Kate for taking care of me while I've been laid up. For good times and the bad times are not just words.


21 August 2012
Starting to wonder if I'm the physical humor comic relief for a secretly recorded sitcom.

 
22 August 2012
My foot fits back into my shoe. Saturday and Sunday I wondered if that would ever happen again.


December 2015
In August, I missed a step and severely injured my ankle. I was bed ridden for several days. It was a wakeup call that I needed to take my disability more seriously. I made an appointment to see a disability lawyer and he convinced me it was time to start the process. So on a morning in September, I called HR and went on leave. It was one of the hardest calls I’ve ever made. It violated a core part of my soul to say I couldn’t cope. 

Work put me on short term disability and their insurance company started dealing with me. That process has been hell and is ongoing several years later.


Part 19 can be found here.